*some names have been changed for privacy sake*
For where two or three are gathered together in my name,
there am I in the midst of them. ~ Matthew 18:20
“What happens if they
fire Chris from Adventures in Odyssey?? They hire someone new. Let’s name him
Bob and he is very dull. "Hi. My name is Bob. Welcome to Adventures in
Odyssey."
"Who tied my shoelaces together when I tried to jump
out of the truck?" (From my dad on his computer in the bedroom. He’s a
gamer.)
Key verse: Pray
without ceasing. ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:17
Eve: "I got married before S."
Little while later, Tom: "S just won the
lottery. She's kicked out of the church."
Emily: "No, she's in a mega-church now."
S: "I OWN the church."
"A put one
of Ringo's treats in your mouth and got the dog to take it." ~ aunt
Eve: "This can won't open! Tom, can you come open
this can for me?"
Tom: "Try using a can opener."
"Moo!" ~ TJ with a basket on his back, turtle-style.
S lets out an ear piercing scream from her bedroom and
yells, "There's a bear in here!"
Eve starts laughing and so do I.
Eve comes down with dog and is laughing so hard she's
crying. "I didn't think she'd scream."
Me: Hey, Emily, remember how hard you said it was when you
deleted that guy?
Emily: No.
Me: Well, anyway, try deleting a guy. From both accounts!
Emily: That so deserves to go in your quotes!
“The attic is above
the bathroom. A scratching is coming from up there. Billy the Exterminator or
Verminators?” ~ sis
"Juicy
Fruit is gonna move ya... Now with bran!" ~ Tom
A: "How do you spell 'calebration'?"
Me: "Don't you mean 'celebration', A?"
A: "No, I already know how to spell that."
"I don't like sunny
days. I wipe the table and everyone can tell when it's not all the way clean." ~ Me
"She never lets
me do anything with her. She's such a mean sister. Timmie, do you know where a
tack is?" ~ A complaining about S.
Noah ---
Shem: "Dad, we got a leak."
Noah: "How?"
Shem: "Woodpeckers."
~
"Hey Noah, where should we put these bees?"
"Just put em' in the arkhive."
"Remember, everything happens for a reason. But sometimes the
reason is that you made a dumb choice."
Nana: Oh, Eve! I only have a few minutes to talk. I'm going
out the door.
Eve: Why are you going out the door?
Nana: Because I can't go out the window. Duh! And you think
I ask the stupid questions.
Emily: My hand is swollen.
A: It's because you wave it too much
S: How do you eat rice with chopsticks?
Emily: Very carefully...
W:"Dirty Gertie?"
"Yeah, she is when she poops and then steps in
it."
W:"I hate when I do that."
Took a drink of Tom's water.
Tom: Don't spit in it.
Me: *Takes a drink, gurgles, and hands it back* Thanks!
Tom: *Raising bottle above his hand and looks in it*
Defer ~ sis' definition: when we shave our cat.
Real definition: to give up rights in order to agree with
others.
Mom: M, what does a sheep say?
M: DUDE! *raises her index finger and points it* (Her
way of raising her thumb.)
3 green, 3 blue, 1 pink, and 1 gold easter eggs. Offer some
to Emily some. She took the gold.
Me: Hey! That's the only gold one!
Emily: *puts gold back and takes pink*
Me: Hey! That's the only pink one!
"Two sisters can't share a sweater, much less a husband." ~ A
friend's mom talking about Leah and Rachel.
"Aren't Pizza
Twice and Pizza Pizza the same thing?" ~ Tom randomly.
"Your socks are
so dirty, one is pink and one is blue!"
T watching
NASCAR and yelling, "Turn, turn, turn!... A car blewed up!"
"They had wood back in the olden
days?" ~ A (Watching Flintstones):
*Writing and Tom is reading over my shoulder*
Tom: How do you keep the names straight?
Me: It's easy. I have a character list. (Which I don't use,
because I remember their names.)
Tom: I end up changing the names half-way through, so I
never remember.
*Phones rings*
Eve: IT'S AUNTIE ______!
Everyone in the room: GIVE IT TO ME!
Eve smiles at everyone and picks up the phone.
"Hello?"
Watched a guy pretend
to ride a motorcycle though the McDonald's Drive-Thru in Houlton and order a
drink. He then proceeds to "ride" his motorcycle into a parking space
and gets off. He then walks away as if nothing had happened....
Tom: The Oak Ridge Boys? They're still around?
Me: Um... Yes.
June 8 ~ The day was not only
Best Friend's Day, but it was also Name Your Poison Day...
Me: M, can you count to 5?
M: 5! Yay!
"Hurry! Somebody
save him! Bob's climbing the tree!" ~ A (talking about our cat)
Eve: I want to have twins. A boy and a girl. And I'm naming
them Nancy and Drew.
Me: And I want you to marry a guy named Joe Hardy. I don't
think it's very likely.
Me: I don't remember how to do a treble clef. I thought it
looked like this.
Emily: like this *does one perfectly*
Me: show off.
Tom: "Nothing more refreshing than getting splashed
in the face by toilet water"
Me and Emily: "Did you fix it?"
Tom: "Yes"
Went for a walk with the neighbor kids.
Neighbor boy (14): *yells* It's not private property! It's
government owned.
Eve: Well, it's not so private now that you yelled about
it!
Got up my nose and in
my hair in July: Water, puffed rice, Jell-O, oatmeal, potato, and soap. Then I blew my
nose and it was orange.
“The rooster didn't even go off this morning!” ~ Emily
In other words, it didn't go "cock-a-doodle-do".
Eve to me: "When a guy proposed to you, you're gonna run
inside screaming and yelling."
Emily: "Yeah, and then we go, 'So did you say yes?' and you run back out."
S *pokes Billy*: Move!
Me: S, there are plenty of other seats.
S *grunts as she lifts Billy up*: Yes, but I want this
one. *plops Billy onto the floor*
Emily and I came
inside from doing morning chores this morning and T asks us "Did you
milk the cow?"
Um, we didn't have a cow at this time...
Sruns inside: I can ride a bike.
Emily: Well, why did you stop?
S: Because I almost ran into the house.
T stole the train from M. M marches into the
kitchen, gets a chair, pulls it up to the sink, gets a glass of water, goes
into the living room and dumps it on T.
Wait on the LORD: be
of good courage, and He shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.
(Psalms 27:14 KJV)
"I woke up at 6:30 and at 8 went out to do chores and a pig peed in my croc!" ~ Me
"There were 5 kids in Jr. Church and 7 cups of juice
ended up spilling." ~ Me
“Don Cherry is the
Canadian Mr. Brown!”
M pretending to
make herself an ice cream. She dropped it on the floor. I told her "Clean
it up" and she bent down to lick the floor.
Tom: If a duck had one leg, would it swim in a circle?
Ty: Yes, if it had one wing going.
Pulled my ponytail
out to redo it and a huge spider fell from out from in my hair. That's wasn't
the bad part. The worst part is, when it fell to the floor, it was still alive
and ran away.
"BUBBLES!” Emily is
doing dishes and tiny bubbles start to flow around her and she raises her hands
up and says that.
“Signs things aren't
going too well: You walk into a door... and apologize.” ~ From a friend
T just got up from his 5 hour long nap.
Emily: Hey, buddy! I went to youth group!
T: Me know. And me no have supper yet.
In the van...
A: I'm pulling the legs off this dead fly.
Me: *looks over and sees the fly flapping its wings* A,
that fly is still alive.
A: *drops fly and it can still fly* Well, I thought it
was dead.
“I like using a tape gun. It makes me feel powerful.” ~ Me
“Mess with me and
I'll write you in a story. Just to make you the person everyone doesn't like.” ~ Me
“Well, this is embarrassing.” ~ Family friend about his quad
not starting.
Uncle tells me
that 30 is the new 20 for a guy. He told me to write this down so I'd remember,
so when I was 28 and getting married, he could tell me "I told you
so".
“The washing machine
ate my underwear!”
“Joe Jonas was
sitting in the cafeteria at school today.” ~ Emily (I think she’s losing it!)
“I want to eat a toilet!” ~ Eve (Talking about Cake Boss.)
“Mommy, you know you tan pick tat up wif your hands?” ~
T (Talking about bunny poop.)
“I feel like a pink snowman that's got heatstroke.” ~ S
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive
us our sins, and to cleanse us from all. ~ 1 John 1:9
“You know it's Christmas time when, you write
"hohoho" instead of "hehehe"....”
T: Hey! Why A have big plate?
Emily: Because there aren't enough spoons.
Emily: Santa is in Switzerland!
*few seconds later* Scratch that. He's still in France,
apparently.
Eve: He forgot someone!
“Cuz if I put it to
my eye and hit it on the ground, it sounds like I'm in a video game in space
shooting the bad guys.” ~ Me about my slinky
Watching Handy Manny:
Manny talking about his motorbike ~ Awe! Looks like one of
the screws are loose.
Emily in the chair: HA!
Me: He talks to tools. That's not the only screw loose....
Eve's watch keeps
beeping. She said that the next person that asks her what the beeping is, she's
going to answer, "It's my heart monitor..."
“I'm turning into a
smurf!” ~ Me
I can do all things
through Christ which strengtheneth me. (Philippians 4:13 KJV)
Hope you all enjoy!
